Love and Dr. Seuss

I just need to remind myself of something, so I figured I need to write about it here.

I was flipping through the Bumper Stickers on Facebook (yeah, not exactly the place I would have thought I'd get some advice from), when I came upon this quote from Dr. Seuss.

"You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams."

It's so pretty.
Very idealistic. But still, pretty.

Torn between two lovers

My first love is calling me back.

No, I'm not talking about an ex, or a middle school crush. I'm talking about my REAL first love.

News.

Just when I thought I have finally moved on, it slowly beckons me to come back. Not that I'm not excited about the prospect of falling in love with it all over again.

The executive producer of a local news station that I interned with almost two years ago emailed me and asked if I was interested in a freelance associate producer position.

You should have seen me jump around my room.

Then I saw the dry erase board that hung on my wall. I stared at my list of choice grad schools that I finally had the motivation to compile.

My new love is on the other line, impatiently waiting for me to pick up.

Politics.

I went to the job interview. Walked down the halls that I still know so well, it felt like home again. Ahhhh, the comfort and the safety of something that I learned to love over so many years. The feeling that I thought I had gotten over after it failed to keep my interest after the summer ended.

But at the same time, I felt like I was cheating on my new love. I thought we had an understanding. A plan to move back to DC.

Maybe it was just a fling after all.

The news bug bit me way back in high school. But is the infection stronger than that of the Potomac fever I caught just this past summer?

The first has always been good to me. It's the safe route I took all the way through college. The opportunities that it has opened up for me have been amazing. The second is new and exciting. It's fiery and scandalous. It's something different.

I got the job, by the way. I couldn't be any happier. Or am I?

For now, I'll play them both. See where either will take me. And of course, I'll have to choose what's best for me.

Huge decision to make. Would choosing one mean losing the other forever? Should I risk the love of one to pursue the other?

This dilemma ALMOST makes dealing with men a walk in the park.

Two months, a whole lotta change

So it's been a couple of months since I last wrote. I'm still working the same ol' boring job, still living in same ol' boring Jacksonville. But things have definitely changed and I'm so excited about every little detail.

Can't exactly spill everything here, but one thing's for sure, I'm happy :)

But today I decided to actually be proactive, (haha, like I haven't been in the past few months) and start looking into grad school. I've always looked at American University as my first choice, but I've missed their merit scholarship deadline, so I thought I couldn't go to grad school until fall 2009.

Wrong.

Did a little bit more research and it turns out that the three other major universities in the Washington, DC area have programs that are similar, if not more targeted to what I want to do. My top choice now is Johns Hopkins University that offers an MA in Communication in Contemporary Society program. The best part: it doesn't require a GRE score.

SCORE!

I also looked into Florida schools and both Florida and Florida State have programs, but Florida offers a program that's specifically for Political Communication. (And I would much rather be a member of the Gator Nation anyway, haha).

So that's the most recent deal. You may very well be reading the thoughts of a future press secretary or campaign manager. Funny how those possibilities conjure up the same emotions I once felt about being a news anchor or reporter.

All these things brought to me by one summer spent in DC.

A change of heart?

For the past couple of months, I was worried that moving to a bigger city first (like DC) means having to give up being a reporter. Journalism was definitely my first love. But then again, your first love is not always the one that you'll love forever.

Should I dare say it? I don't think my heart is in reporting anymore.

I still love the news. And journalism. But actually being the reporter? Well, that's a different story. At least, that's what I'm thinking right now.

I think I'm starting to fall in love with something else.

Politics.

(Geez. Of all things?)

Well, political communication, at least. Like working for a press office, and work my way to being a press secretary.

Not actually being the politician, mind you. Just working for one.

I guess once you've caught Potomac Fever, you're infected for life. At least, for a while.

So I think I need to go to grad school for this one. And yes, I always knew I wanted to go to grad school, just didn't know for what. There's an answer for you.

And now the deadline for grad school applications for fall are quickly approaching. (American University is my first choice. More like my only choice.) And I haven't even taken the GRE yet. I think I might have to wait until the spring, or next fall.

What now until then?

Hmmm...lots to think about.

(Or maybe, my desire to go back to DC is what's propelling this change.)

I'm soooo lost.

A year in review, and a look ahead

I could hardly believe it's already 2008.

There's so much to look forward to. I have so many uncertainties about the future, but then life wouldn't be as interesting if anything was certain, would it?

2007 was a year of growing up. It was a year of change, of decision-making, of experiencing things that I've never done. And I'm confident in saying that 2007 was a year of no regrets.

As for the rest of the world, well, I can't exactly say the same thing:



So what's ahead in 2008? I feel that it's going to be a transition year. It's gonna be exciting and difficult, and tons of changes will be made along the way, but thank God for His constant love and unchanging grace that sustains me day in and day out.

For everyone else, well, there's the election to look forward to. This race is so exciting (well, for me at least) and I hope the right person will win the bid. But what's right for one is not necessarily right for another, but go figure, that's the excitement of politics for you.

Hmmm ... speaking of politics, that's definitely something that I would not have been excited about exactly a year ago. Oh, how much one year can change a person!

The art of patience and trust

The past 8 years of my life has been very well planned. It's all on Excel spreadsheets, they're all still saved on my computer -- what classes I'm supposed to take for each semester, the grades I get for each class, when I'm supposed to be doing what. I liked the structure. I liked knowing what I'm supposed to do next.

Then came graduation. Yeah, now I get to do this, and do that, move here, and work there. But instead, BOOM! The plans came and went.

I had fantastic plans for myself. They weren't get-rich-quick schemes, or anything that would require any compromise of integrity. They involved lots of hard work, ambition, and growing up. As sincere as my intentions were, they seem to have been either shut down or put to the backburner. And now I feel lost and stagnant at the same time.

I still don't have a clue about what God wants me to do with my life. I want to be obedient, but this whole waiting game is soooo frustrating, especially coming from a girl who likes to plan. (Thus the Excel files, the planner in the bag, the dry-erase board on the wall.)

There are so many things that I know will come in His perfect timing. An awesome career. An awesome husband. An awesome family. An awesome life.

But for now, He's asking me to wait. To stop looking for the things that I want and just keep looking up to Him instead. He maybe breaking me down to the point where I look to Him for everything - my strength, my comfort, my Abba.

Then, when I finally learn to do that, He'll give me the desires of my heart. Because He promises He has better plans than I could ever put together for myself. And He promised that Jesus came so that I could live life more abundantly.

Jeremiah 29:11 says: "'For I know that plans that I have for you,' says the Lord, 'thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.'"

I still cling to that promise. And God is so faithful, I know whatever it is He has planned, it will be amazing.

So, the bottomline is, I'm slowly learning to be patient and to trust God with all that I am. He knows me better anyway. So why the heck is it frustrating me still?

Psalm 130:5 -- "I wait for the LORD, my soul does wait, and my hope is in His word."

Stephen King and the news

I was browsing through the list of headlines that the Drudge Report has (it's how I can keep up nowadays, since I really haven't had the time to watch the news except for those rare times I happen to catch the tail end of the 4-hour long Today Show)...

*Alright, stop, rewind and edit.*

I was browsing through the list of headlines that the Drudge Report has and a headline called "Stephen King suggests Jenna Bush be waterboarded..." caught my attention. It's a Time.com interview by Jon Mahoney of the thriller author, Stephen King. I just thought King's musings about the state of the media nowadays were fascinating:

--

STEPHEN KING: So who's going to be TIME Person of the Year?

TIME: I really don't know, there's a very small group of people who make that decision.

I was thinking, I think it should be Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan.

Really?

Yeah. You know, I just filmed a segment for Nightline, about [the movie version of his novella] The Mist, and one of the things I said to them was, you know, "You guys are just covering — what do they call it — the scream of the peacock, and you're missing the whole fox hunt." Like waterboarding [or] where all the money went that we poured into Iraq. It just seems to disappear. And yet you get this coverage of who's gonna get custody of Britney's kids? Whether or not Lindsay drank at her twenty-first birthday party, and all this other s---. You know, this morning, the two big stories on CNN are Kanye West's mother, who died, apparently, after having some plastic surgery. The other big thing that's going on is whether or not this cop [Drew Peterson] killed his... wife. And meanwhile, you've got Pakistan in the midst of a real crisis, where these people have nuclear weapons that we helped them develop. You've got a guy in charge, who's basically declared himself the military strongman and is being supported by the Bush administration, whose raison d'etre for going into Iraq was to spread democracy in the world.
So you've got these things going on, which seem to me to be very substantive, that could affect all of us, and instead, you see a lot of this back-fence gossip. So I said something to the Nightline guy about waterboarding, and if the Bush administration didn't think it was torture, they ought to do some personal investigation. Someone in the Bush family should actually be waterboarded so they could report on it to George. I said, I didn't think he would do it, but I suggested Jenna be waterboarded and then she could talk about whether or not she thought it was torture. And then the guy from Nightline said, "Well, obviously you've not been watching World News Tonight with Charlie Gibson." But I do — I watch 'em all!

You might be one of the few people who does.
We're news junkies in my house.

Do you actually think Britney and Lindsay should be on our cover?
Yeah, I do.

Sort of a, 'This is what the media's actually interested it, so let's just put it out there' thing?
I think there ought to be some serious discussion by smart people, really smart people, about whether or not proliferation of things like The Smoking Gun and TMZ and YouTube and the whole celebrity culture is healthy. We've switched from a culture that was interested in manufacturing, economics, politics — trying to play a serious part in the world — to a culture that's really entertainment-based. I mean, I know people who can tell you who won the last four seasons on American Idol and they don't know who their f------ Representatives are.

But you've been well in the public eye for decades now. Is it pretty blatant how much worse it's gotten?
It's worse every year. And the guy says to me — the Nightline guy — I didn't get the guy's name. Granted, I haven't been feeling real well and it was a long day of interviews. But he said to me, "If we didn't cover cultural things, we wouldn't be covering you and The Mist, and promoting the movie." And I'm like, "Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan aren't cultural." They aren't political. They're economic only in the mildest sense of the word. In fact, if I had to pick somebody, some celebrity who has had some impact this year, some sort of echo in the larger American life, I would say Hannah Montana. That whole issue of online ticket sales and scalping fascinates me. There are [legitimate] issues there about the Internet, so that actually does seem to have some cultural significance. But Britney? Britney Spears is just trailer trash. That's all. I mean, I don't mean to be pejorative. But you observe her behavior for the past five years and you say, "Here's a lady who can't take care of her kids, she can't take care of herself, she has no retirement fund, everything that she gets runs right through her hands." And yet, you know and I know that if you go to those sites that tell you what the most blogged-about things on the Internet are, it's Britney, it's Lindsay. So I think it would be terrific [to have them as TIME Persons of the Year]. There would be such a scream from the American reading public, sure. But at the same time, it's time for somebody to discuss the difference between real news and fake news.

--

I didn't even read the rest of the story, but so true. Takes me back to the media theory days of "gatekeeping."

Interesting. The guy's brilliant and freaky.

(Pic from the Time.com story)


Thoughts later...

Thanksgiving overflow

Can hardly believe it's that time of the year again. Well, Florida "fall" weather makes it even harder to believe so.

That excuse to eat an exorbitant amount of food, spend tons of money and deck the halls with boughs of holly.

Ooooh...and the new Relient K Christmas album should be out soon too. But I digress.

The American holiday season is now becoming an exercise of excess. (Not that we don't already do that every other day of the year.)

1. Excess of food - bring on the pounds!
2. Excess of shopping - 4 am doorbusters!
3. Excess of decor - gigantic blow-up snowglobe!

Despite the commercialization of the holiday season, there's something about it that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside. (Yeah, cheese grits, but true.) So many memories of holidays past come flooding in, reminding me of how good I've really got it. It reminds me of how blessed I've been through all these years. It reminds me to be THANKFUL for what I've got, instead of long for what I don't.

God has given me 22 wonderful years of health, happiness, love and grace. And as if that's not enough, he pours on the blessings. And then some.

Talk about an overflow? My cup runneth over.

Death by media crucifixion

I happened to catch the Today Show yesterday morning (a rare instance nowadays), and Matt Lauer interviewed a husband who is now considered a suspect in his third wife's death and his fourth wife's disappearance. If you're not familiar with the story, read up. Watch the interview here:


Exclusive: Peterson talks to TODAY

Then today, Lauer asked two "experts" to analyze the interview, scrutinizing the accused man's body language, manner of speech, and choice of words.

As a budding journalist, I mostly paid attention to the way Lauer asked his questions and his follow up questions. I respect him so much as a journalist. But his questions seemed to be the kind that lawyers ask during a trial. What was he trying to do? Try to force a confession out of Peterson and consider the revelation a worthy addition to Lauer's "best journalistic moments" retirement video montage? I watched as the man, Drew Peterson, answered Lauer's questions with indifference and nonchalance, a reaction that seemed to have convinced the "expert" this morning that he is indeed guilty.

The bottom line is, the media seemed to have made up their mind about the case before it is even tried in a court of law.

I love the Today Show. And Matt Lauer for that matter. And journalism is my true love. But I think this is an instance where the journalism gets in the way of justice.

Whatever happened to innocent before proven guilty? The right to a fair trial, anyone?

I am in no way defending this man. He could be guilty for all I know. (Remember Scott Peterson and his pregnant wife, Lacy?) But that's just it. I don't know. And neither does anybody else, until the case is put on trial.

The media's job is to tell the story as it is. And yes, some part of the job calls for interpretation and speculation. The job calls for asking questions about the current system.

But does that mean asking questions before the current system does?

Another part of it is that if this case has to be tried with a jury, some of the potential members of that group may have seen the interview, and might have been swayed by the way Lauer packaged the story. Although the jurors are asked to check their prior assumptions at the courtroom door, and to forget everything they have known about the case thus far, Lauer's interview may just alter the case, and a fair and just trial may have just been thrown out the window.

Just a thought.

Yet Another Dance RAWR Dance Blog Entry

Just because I ♥ these guys! I can't wait to see them on Friday!!! Aaaahhhh!!!





I have a feeling it's gonna be amazing!

At 22, the start of something new?

After 3 months of uncertainty (and counting), it's so weird to be back here in DC. It feels so much like home now. I know exactly where things are and I don't feel like such a lost puppy anymore, even though I'm walking downtown by myself. So sitting here on a bench in the National Mall, the Washington Monument to the left and Capitol Hill on the right, I have a feeling that this is where I ought to be.

Going back home to Jacksonville will be interesting (yet again). I love it here so much. Too bad my family and friends and home church has to be so far away. The job interviews went really well, I'm just hoping they would give me a call in the next couple of weeks.

DC looks so different in the fall than in the summer. For one, there are definitely less tourists around. It's a lot quieter. It's colder and the leaves are starting to change colors. I can't imagine what this place will look like when the Mall is covered in snow, or around the holidays. Maybe I'll get to find out soon enough. This visit was an awesome birthday present!

So, I'm officially 22 now. Wow, I'm getting older. I don't feel any different, just ready to start the next phase of my life. The independent phase. The moving on with my life phase. The growing up phase. I know that at some point, when bills come in the mail and things get kinda lonely and life isn't going as planned, I'll start wishing I was in college again, living at home, with no financial responsibilities, except for my monthly car payment. But right now, I'm ready. If God will open a door here, then I'll know that this is where I ought to be. For now, at least.

The remaining question is, am I ready to say hasta luego to reporting for now?

Another year older ... could DC play a big part?

I'm flying to DC in the morning for some interviews and I'm excited to be back in a city that I love once again.

Nervous? Yes. Second thoughts? Maybe.
But overall, excited.

And I'm turning 22 while I'm up there.

I can't help but think what kind of role the city will play in the 22nd year of life that God has blessed me to experience. Will it play a part in it at all?

I kept telling myself that I want to move back to DC. Be close to things that I love so much - media, politics, culture, diversity, nightlife. So why the second thoughts?

Well, there's something tugging at my heart, pulling me towards something that I've always wanted to push towards.
Being a reporter.
Something that I can't do in DC. At least not yet.

But hopefully, whatever it is that lies ahead, whatever glimpse that the next few days will show me about the future, I would find myself in obedience to what God wants me to do.

So here goes...wish me luck.

Pinay Pride - A Filipina's Beauty

What, you ask, makes a Filipino woman beautiful?
Well, here's a "Modern Pinay" answer:

"What is deemed beautiful has been a source of philosophical debate since pre-Socratic periods. Ever since humans discovered the pleasures from objects or situations that are perceived to be valuable and meaningful, he has had a glimpse of beauty.

So, what is this beauty and how does it affect the Filipina? The composer and critic Robert Schumann tries to answer the former with a term he coined Aesthetics. Aesthetics is a philosophical discipline that attempts to understand the nature of beauty. According to Schumann there are two kinds of beauty: natural and poetic beauty. In this framework, where does the Filipina fare? Is her beauty natural or is it poetic?


According to Schumann, both kinds of beauty can be found in music as in other art forms. The difference is that the former can be found in the contemplation of nature, in the technical structure of objects as the latter is in man’s creative intervention into nature. Natural beauty stops, at sensual delight, where poetic beauty begins. This being said, the natural beauty of the Filipina is in the bone structure of her face, the symmetry of her features, the proportion of her body, the prominence of her cheekbones, the youthful features, her slight built, her natural tan. All these traits contribute to her physical attractiveness, making her loved by cameras and sought by men.

But recent medical technology can imitate what was not present at birth. Anyone who can afford can go to a plastic surgeon for cheek implants and Botox injections. Anyone with the right money can get a liposuction and a fake tan. If these are the things that make Filipinas beautiful then she is no different from everyone else who can afford to pay to have them. It is in the character of the Filipina and her interaction with the world that makes her poetically beautiful. The Filipina is naturally adaptable and resourceful.

She survives any given climate or economic condition. Travel and you shall find, in every corner of the globe is a Filipina. Her sense of humour and her sunny personality slows down her ageing. She is not a Filipina if she does not smile in ten-minute intervals at most. She has the natural instinct to take care of those who need it. This is apparent in every medical institution across the world where a Filipina does not leave her ward without the arrival of her substitute. Her strong moral fibre and superior judgement makes of an exceptional leader. Her innate charm and quiet reserve enables her to take charge without stepping on men?s fragile egos.

She is every Filipino’s mother whom he runs to for support and advice. Her love for life and her laughter is infectious. She makes the atrocities of life bearable for those who surround her. The very existence of a Filipina in itself is poetry. It is textured by strange contradictions: a contrast between tenderness and strength, influence and subtlety, cruelty and virtue. It is this intrinsic trait that proves her beautiful beyond physical attraction. It is the kind that remains in human consciousness. It is the kind of beauty that makes legends, inspires songs. It is the kind of beauty that is remembered. It is the kind of beauty that can never be achieved by any cosmetic procedure. It is the kind of beauty that survives aging and even death.

Those who are merely preoccupied with the superficiality of physical attractiveness may be short-changed by their own narrow points of view, but regardless of the extent of anyone’s vocabulary or the depth of his definition of beauty, all can reach an agreement that the Filipina is indeed beautiful."

Oh yeah. :)

Dance Rawr Dance Party!

Ahhhh...Family Force 5 is coming to town in November! What an awesome birthday present...even if it was two weeks late.




November 15 @ Murray Hill Theater...
Wooo!! It's going to be amazing!! :)

Quoting Kelly Clarkson

I want out. Of Jacksonville.
If not, I have an inkling that I'll be stuck here.

In a state of stagnancy.

I want a life of my own.
Make my decisions. Make my mistakes.

To have no one to answer to but myself.
To have no one to depend on but God.

To break away.

"Wanting to belong here
But something felt so wrong here
So I prayed I could break away."

Well, I'm still praying. And waiting.

Jacksonville will always be home.
But right now, I feel I should be somewhere else.
Anywhere but here.

Conflict in Iraq, conflict about Iraq

I was flipping through the channels, and decided there was nothing on and somehow ended up watching PBS. There was a show called NOW and I caught the last half hour of an episode about soldiers in Iraq. After Gen. David Petraeus' report, the President's address, and, well, Anderson Cooper's recent Iraq trip, I became interested.

Here's the episode on the PBS Web site.

The soldiers spoke about their job in Iraq and the life they left at home. They understood the sacrifice, and knew that death may be the end result. But still they fight, some on their third trip. The story reported that although the Army fell short of their monthly recruitment goal again, the numbers of those who re-enlist are still steady. It cited financial stability as a major incentive, and there's a $20,000 bonus for those who re-enlist, tax-free if serving abroad.

One quote was unforgettable. I don't remember it verbatim, but here's the gist of it: Every time you go, there's a slimmer chance of getting out alive.

So now, with all this talk about what to do and the apparent lack of exit strategy, what is left? Should we keep setting benchmarks? Should we make deadlines? Should we draw a line to our responsibility? Would pulling out of this messy war dishonor the soldiers who have already died fighting in it? Would pulling out send a message to our both our allies and enemies that we are weak?

Can we really wait until next summer to have 30,000 troops pulled out of Iraq?

Here's my stance:

Yes, we did begin this war (September 11 was not a trigger for the war in Iraq. If it is, then we are fighting the wrong war. Focus would definitely have to be shifted) and we have some sort of responsibility for the people of Iraq because of this. But where does responsibility cross the line?

We have no place in their civil war. America went through a civil war. And I think the country became stronger because of it. Because people themselves wanted the change.

We have already helped them to establish a democratic government. It is unstable right now, but how long should we be there to help them? If their people actually want democracy, they're gonna have to make it work. We can't force it on them. They've become so dependent on us, we're spending so much money on this war - money that could be spent on education and infrastructure. It all sounds so U.S.-centric. But the Iraqi government needs to start taking responsibility for their own people.

But there is also the other side. An unstable Iraq makes a vulnerable Iraq. According to Ambassador Samir Sumaidaie, the Iraqi ambassador to the U.S., a vulnerable Iraq means terrorists can take over the country, gain the political and economic strength that they need to come after us. He said during a press briefing back in June in Washington (which I had the privilege to cover) that winning in Iraq means to "deny the terrorists a state of their own" and to allow the new democratic state to "have the requirements for survival."

Both sides of the Senate aisle debated about this all summer (remember that all-nighter in July? Click the links to see my talking points from the after-debate press conferences from both sides...that was great fun). Republicans wanted to wait for the September report to decide (Democrats criticized this, saying Reps would much rather protect the President over protecting the troops). Democrats have already decided long before hearing Petraeus' report. (Republicans criticized this, saying Dems just wanted to advance their political agenda).

So as much as there is a conflict in Iraq, there is a conflict about Iraq. The unpopularity of this war is definitely growing, and Americans are becoming war weary. But is that enough reason to leave? Even more, is Congress listening to their constituents, or, wrapped up in winning more seats for their respective parties in the upcoming election?

Scrapbook, Justin Timberlake, Procrastination

What do they all have in common? They're all keeping me from my job search.
Welcome to my world.

I'm working on my Paris scrapbook (still) while watching Justin Timberlake's HBO special (I'm waiting for him to perform Summer Love). And that = Procrastination.

Life post-college hasn't really been all that exciting. I have resumes out all over the place, mostly in New York and Washington. But I will get started on putting together my 5-minute reporter demo reel tomorrow. Then send those out to at least 25 smaller market stations in the country. **crosses fingers**

But I think the worst part is not knowing where I'll be in the next few months or the next year. I may not have my "real world job" in the next couple of months, but will I be spending my 22nd birthday with my family? Will I be celebrating Thanksgiving with new friends instead? Will I be having my first white Christmas this year?

I can't make any long term plans. Except for that vacation to the Philippines this summer. (Which I'm SO very excited about...I get to see my grandma after 10 years!)

But I guess it is not up to me, is it? I don't know what God has planned, but there are definitely days when I get really impatient for an answer. I just want to know already!

Patience. Now that's something they don't teach in college. Unless of course you're growing cells in a biology lab.

But I want Samantha Brown's job!

Attention current college kids: graduating summa cum laude does not guarantee you a job straight after college. So enjoy college life, because you'll have the same diploma as that kid snoring in the back row, or even that kid who only shows up for the midterm and the final.

Not that I regret it or anything.

So, I'm starting on the post-college job hunt, and I think I have an idea of what I want to do. Yes, I still want to be a reporter. But at the same time, I don't want to end up in a podunk in the middle of nowhere reporting on cat fashion shows (see Anchorman). I love the news industry and want to work in it, but breaking in is tough.

Yeah, I know I've only been on the job search for the past two weeks and I can't expect a "real" job by tomorrow, but it's so tough finding a job that will start you off for the rest of your life. That sounds so serious. Almost too serious. For a recent college grad fresh off of a Washington extravaganza, at least.

So I've come to a conclusion. If I can't go after Meredith Vieira's job just yet, I'm going after Samantha Brown's.

Who is she, you ask? She's Travel Channel's main travel reporter. She was the host of "Great Hotels" and "Great Vacation Homes," recently finished "Passport to Europe" and now hosting "Passport to Latin America." All she gets to do throughout the show is smile, talk and TRAVEL! She eats the amazing food, sleeps in amazing hotel rooms, hangs out with amazing locals and tries all these amazing things.

I can smile, talk and travel. And eat, sleep and hang out too.
How did she come across this job anyway? Samantha, will you be passing the torch anytime soon???

Okay, so back to the job search. I sent out applications to networks, mostly in DC and NYC, to be a news assistant for major national networks. I'm trying to get a job through contacts as well, because unfortunately, as with many other industries, it's mostly about who you know, not what you know. (Which, of course, takes me back to my first point about the use of graduating with honors, but I digress.) I haven't sent out any demo tapes yet for a reporter job, but from what I was told up in DC, I need to send about 30 to 40 tapes. Maybe I need to get cracking on that task soon.

As for Samantha's job, the Travel Channel is not taking resumes right now. Trust me, I checked.

Hello, real world...

I graduated. Yay!

It's hard to believe that four years have come and gone. But what an amazing four years it has been!



And yes, those yellow cords mean summa cum laude, baby!!!
So yeah, peace out UNF!!!

If you want to know what's next, don't ask. At least not yet. Let me enjoy my moment for a little bit longer before the "real world" smacks me right on the forehead. Oh joy.

On brides and babies

I'm going to a friend's wedding this Saturday, and I still have to figure out what I'm going to wear.

She's my age and ready to settle down. Well, I'm not.

So many people who I went to high school or college with are either married or just had their first child. I can't even imagine myself doing either at this point in my life.

I'm 21! And so are they!

Yes, I feel a little bit of pressure. My cousins got married young and it's kinda almost expected in Filipino families. But I'm so focused on getting my career jumpstarted, I really could care less right now.

So my friends had their bridal showers and baby showers, and their wedding receptions and first birthdays ... and pictures are up on facebook.

I am happy for them. They found the person they want to spend the rest of their lives with early in life. Well, that's nice.

Subsequently, I'm kinda asking God to hold off on "him." Although "he" would be nice to be with now, not yet. I want my time to be alone - to be able to do things without asking for someone else's permission, without considering someone else's opinion. Allow me to figure out who I am, who I want to be first. It's only then that I can honestly say that I can give myself away completely to someone else, without losing grip of myself in the process.

Sounds selfish.

But if I don't do that now, I won't be able to do that later in life. I'll look back with regrets.

So this Saturday, when my friend is wearing her something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue, I'll sit there and be genuinely happy for her. I'll be the one with the red heels on.